As we wait for more exciting things to take place in the art room as we pick up speed after Christmas break, I am going to take this time to introduce you to the one thing that art kids love just as much as being creative; caffeine. This past Saturday, my friend Josie and I took two hours of our chilly Saturday afternoon to drive around to a bunch of different local restaurants and taste test their iced coffees. So, as they say in Mulan, “let's get down to business.”
The Ranking System: We went to eight different coffee places and ordered the exact same thing; a small vanilla iced coffee. We figured this would be a safe option because smalls save money, and it’s hard to mess up vanilla. All of our contestants were ranked on overall taste, actual size of the cup, and the price. Here’s my ranking of my caffeinated adventure from worst to best- for suspense purposes. (Also, I drink coffee every day. Some would say I have a small caffeine addiction. Josie, on the other hand, doesn’t like coffee much, so our rankings varied greatly- but you don’t get to see hers so that’s too bad)
East End Coffee Co.: I was honestly very excited to try this coffee. I had only had it once and I remembered liking it. But sadly, we got there just after they had closed. So just a heads up to you readers out there, East End closes at 2:00 on Saturdays. Weirdos.
Burger King: We got this coffee towards the end of our journey, and it was honestly hilarious. Burger King’s small sizes almost fit perfectly into my hand- and my hands aren’t that big. It was just… so tiny. I kinda love it honestly. It gave me a good laugh. It cost $1.47, and it was by far the sweetest coffee we tried that day. If you’re looking for something sweet, this might be the right place for you.
McDonald’s: Unlike Burger King, this cup was actually normal-sized for a small. However, the actual coffee itself was a little watered down and didn’t have much flavor. I’m a firm believer that McDonald’s coffee gets better the bigger the size, so if you’re intrigued by this, maybe shoot for a medium. Their small costs $2.11- which is also the same price as a Burger King large… do with that information what you wish.
Dunkin Donuts: Now before you all get out your torches and pitchforks, let me explain myself. I eat, sleep, and breathe Dunkin Donuts. I wholeheartedly believe that they are 10x better than Starbucks, and I will die on that hill. This coffee costs $2.64, and unlike our previous two places, they asked for your cream and sugar preferences (which I appreciated). It was fairly true to size, but it was also definitely on the sweeter side of these drinks. Did I get sugar in this? Yes. Are their coffees just normally sweet? Also yes. Overall however, I still enjoyed this coffee. (Please don’t burn my house down, Dunkin fans, I’m begging you.)
Sheetz: The size options for this coffee were “regular” and large, so I went for the regular. It fared pretty well size-wise compared to the rest, only standing a bit taller than a few of our other drinks. This coffee costs $3.19, but they gave you LOTS of options to put in this drink when it came down to creamers, extra espresso shots, extra flavoring, etc. I think I just simply went for some creamer, and this coffee was a nice mix of sweetness and actual coffee taste. Still a little sweet, but you could tell you were drinking a coffee. Also, it came with a sippy cup lid, which I really liked. Save the turtles sksksksks and all that.
Walnut Cheese Nook: One of our locally owned stores, and let me tell you; these guys make a mean coffee. I had to get an iced latte, and it only came in one size. This coffee was 16 ounces, and cost $4.02, but man was it good. It had a great balance between vanilla and coffee flavors. However, when I received this drink, it was still warm because they brewed it on the spot. With this in mind, it got better with time as it cooled down and the ice did its thing.
Rutters: Honestly, until I sat down and wrote this article, this coffee sat at my number one spot. Like Sheetz, it gave you a great ray of options to put into your coffee, and it was a fantastic blend of not-too-sweet and not-too-strong. It costs $2.97, and (like Sheetz) comes in a “regular” size. Also, this coffee’s comically long straw definitely gave it bonus points in the end.
Guante Cafe: Here she is, the winner of The Great Coffee Showdown finally unveiled. It’s coffee came in one size and cost $4.50- easily making it our most expensive coffee of the day. This does make sense though, seeing that Guante Cafe is locally owned. This drink was the perfect mash-up of flavors. Not too sweet, not too bitter, just overall chefs kiss. Equipt with a sippy cup lid, this drink stood as a fan favorite between all of our taste testers, and I highly recommend stopping by and grabbing one for yourself sometime.
Now that you’ve seen my hot takes on these cold drinks, feel free to use my experiments to steer you in the direction of your next coffee outing, but please don’t follow in my footsteps and drink that much coffee. I’m surprised I’m not still bouncing off the walls…
